Ahoy, Pool Players! It’s another snowy Friday and time again for Survivor! Previously on Survivor, Malolo continued their losing streak and dumped James off the short bus. The next day, Michael knows that he needs a miracle in order to survive. He decides to go searching for the idol IN BROAD DAYLIGHT because that’s the kind of mood he’s in. Angela spots him, and Desi says that he’s paranoid, but, lo-and-behold, Michael finds the idol stuck beneath a tree. Folks, this isn’t just any idol, but the infamous “it’s just a f-ing stick” that got Eliza, Ozzy, and Jason all voted out of Survivor: Fans Versus Favorites. Turns out for ten years this idol has been living on Ghost Island, and has matured into a real immunity idol, just like a butterfly emerging from the cocoon! Michael is thrilled about finding the idol, despite the fact that he was IN SECOND GRADE when it first appeared.
Reward time! In this Reward Challenge the Survivors need to use a rope to hold up some blocks that spell, uh, REWARD. This is literally a repainted version of a challenge from last season, but I’ll take it! The reward winners get a plate full of kebabs, plus a grill to cook them on. Second place gets fewer kebabs, but kebabs nonetheless. Third place is kebab-less, and will be going home with nothing. This is a tight challenge early on, as both Naviti and Yanuya drop, giving Malolo an early lead… which they immediately lose. Naviti gains back their ground and wins, followed by Wendell’s fancy footwork to give Yanuya second place. If you’re keeping score at home, you’ll soon discover this leaves our friends at Malolo in dead last, yet again. The curse continues! Naviti also has to choose someone to go to Ghost Island, and they decide on Kellyn, since Ghost Island is still a mystery and she’s already been. Kellyn doesn’t want to go back to the spooky hotel, one vacancy, but she musters it up and heads off. Naviti and Yanuya collect their kebabs and Malolo, down to three, goes home with zip, zero, zilch, nada!
Spooky times! Kellyn has returned to Ghost Island, and Ghost Island has returned to the game! Yes, after a week-long absence, we are once again traveling to that most haunted isle, where the secrets of Survivor are buried in the graveyard of deceit and deception! Man, I’m starting to think we shouldn’t have booked a room at Casa Ghost Island. We could have been staying at the Ramada, but you said, “Just keep driving, we’ll find a place!” Well I’m pretty sure the place we found is haunted, and they don’t even have H-B-Oooooooo! At Ghost Island, Kellyn once again gets the chance to partake in a spooky game, and this time she takes the bait, saying, “you’ve gotta risk it for the biscuit.” This turn of phrase is not to be confused with the very adult film “Risqué for the Biscuit.” Kellyn’s chance pays off, as she is gifted with the vote steal advantage from Survivor: Game Changers. You remember the one that was on Michaela’s sit-out bench but she totally missed it, and then Officer Sarah found it and used it to vote Michaela out? Well it’s back but it’s no longer a steal, just an extra vote that Kellyn can use at a future Tribal Council. Kellyn says, “This might be the moment Kellyn goes from the sweet girl to being tough enough to win.” Speaking of being tough enough, over at Naviti, Donathan is congratulating himself, and his tribe, on their well-earned victory. In the middle of his moment he’s cut off by a very rude Bradley, who basically says, “OMG, let’s eat!” Bradley has no time for camaraderie! Domenick says that EVEN HE has noticed that Bradley is a bit of a grumpy Gus, acting argumentative and nasty for no reason. When Domenick thinks you may be too over-the-top it might be time to slow down and reconsider your life and choices. Over at Yanuya, Chris is psyched to have the kebabs and announces, to nobody in particular, that he, “Loves to eat!” What a surprise! Yanuya does have a sweet moment where they sing Happy Birthday to Wendell’s lady-friend, Nicole, back home. It’s nice that they chose the actual Happy Birthday song for Nicole and not, “For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow” or “Nicole Nicole, she’s the man, if she can’t do it” etc etc. Wendell says that it’s time to find an advantage, so he goes idol-hunting while the rest of his tribe luxuriates in a kebab-induced coma. Wendell has been noting points of interest on the island, particularly, “a tree that’s wrapped in another tree.” Yo, dawg, we heard you liked trees, so we put a tree inside a tree so you can tree while you tree! Indeed, the base of the tree contains a map to an idol, and Wendell finds it and digs it up. Idol count for the episode; 2! This is a full-blown immunity necklace, the very same one that Erik gave up during Fans Versus Favorites, a past season that’s really paying dividends tonight. This is a cool idol but it’s also ENORMOUS, which means that Wendell has to bury it again. He can’t just shove it in his pants like some stick!
Malolo! Is! Cursed! Desi says that she’s sick of losing, and it’s time to burn their banner to air out the bad juju. You know times are tough for Malolo when they need to resort to arson to feel anything. The banner goes up in flames and it’s time again for another Immunity Challenge. In this Immunity Challenge the Survivors need to swim out to get some rings, and then toss those rings onto a poll. Early on the most thrilling part of this challenge is how Dom leaps into the water, with all the grace of a sack of potatoes being hurtled through the air. After all the swimming, Wendell connects on his rings for Yanuya, and then it’s down to Naviti versus Malolo, just like old times! Michael comes through with the ring toss, and Malolo FINALLY has a victory. Malolo treats this as if they just won the Super Bowl, World Series, and Multimedia Celebrity Poker all at the same time. Congrats to Malolo for breaking the streak and reversing the curse. This just goes to prove that fire does solve all your problems!
A hungry shark in the water greets us at Naviti. Dom begins apologizing for the challenge before he is shushed by YOU GUESSED IT Bradley. Speaking of Bradley, his plan is to vote out Libby, since she’s one of the original Malolos. “Nice to meet ya, now see ya” Bradley says about Libby and also, fortuitously, his own time on Survivor. I hope you’re sitting down because CHELSEA gets HER OWN CONFESSIONAL where she is about as charming and engaged as you’d expect, saying that there are pros and cons to voting out either Libby or Bradley. Thankfully here’s Domenick to explain things more concisely, saying that Bradley is a real pain in the rear end, except he doesn’t say rear end or backside or rump or poop chute or caboose but an ACTUAL swear on this, the family hour! At Tribal Council it’s the broken record of the season, with Jeff asking if the original tribes will stay together or if things could ever be split up. Hang in there, Jeff, tonight might be your night! Even though Bradley talks a big game about unity, it turns out there’s trouble in the tribe, and that trouble starts with a capital B. As Tribal goes on, everyone slowly turns against Bradley, and he has to defend himself by saying that he’s just an argumentative person, and would argue with you about the color of the sky. Bradley doesn’t think about this as arguing, but “opening a dialogue,” presumably one where he tells you how you’re wrong and how he’s right. Bradley argues his way right up to the vote, where he is given the boot, to the extreme relief of all around him. “Oh wow. Damn. That’s crazy,” Bradley says on his way out, clearly in disbelief as to how ANYONE could have ever DISAGREED with him. Bradley is exactly the type of guy who overhears a conversation he disagrees with and butts in with a wild ACTUALLY when he really should learn just to keep his yap shut. Adios, Bradley. Don’t let the door hit your caboose on the way out!
Make sure you hop on over to the Leaderboards to see where you stand. The Pool Princess just opened the door and said “SLEDDING?” but she promises to take off her snowsuit long enough to send out the next pool points opportunity. Next time on Survivor: it’s the merge! It’s Dom versus Chris! It’s Dom versus the water! It’s Chris versus the pronunciation of “suave”! Who will emerge victorious? Tune in next week!